Anxiety Trials is a Pokemon Special sandbox RP. We are a friendly, no-fuss site where you don't have to worry about posting 24/7, but when you've got the muse. We are based loosely around the Pokemon Special/Adventures manga, though set in a slightly alternate universe. If you're looking for a fun place to explore what life with Pokemon would be like, hopefully we're the place for you!
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ANXIETY TRIALS was created by Fate. The skin which includes the Board Mod, Mini Profile and Sidebar are created by Dorothia @ Adoxography. The tabbed sidebar was created by kimset of RPG D'. Plug ins were made by their respective PB Support member. All other information which includes but is not limited to, Character Plots, Character Applications and more belong to their rightful owner. Pokemon/Pokemon Special is the property of Nintendo.
You will never understand how much I've hated myself for disappointing you.
So it had come to this. She had fucked up. She realized that.
It was too late to do anything.
It was more than the sheer disappointment and anger that had landed her in this situation. She had done it to herself. She had put on the mask of someone she thought she could be, only to have it strangle her completely. Her entire body was trembling, her face was pale.
Anna was not ready.
'Practice'.
Hardly. She didn't need to practice to remember ingrained routines-- scars that would always be left behind. They cut to the bone but kept her alive. She resented that. She resented herself.
Why the fuck didn't she kick Azel out when she had the chance?
Why the fuck would she fall for simple begging?
The answer was beyond her own mind's reach. She could only tell herself she wanted to feel normal for a change. Except that wasn't normal. It was completely and utterly wrong. Incorrect. She was a failure. Incompetent. Nothing would fix that. It would takes years to redeem herself-- perhaps a lifetime. Or two. She would keep trying, despite the ever-constant reminder that Fernando would toss her aside.
She didn't like his shouting.
She didn't like the look in his eye or the sound of his voice. Constantly condescending. Anna had accepted, even welcomed it before. Now she would rather be a corpse in the Kanto underground.
So this was punishment. She would have to revert to repressed ways to pay for what she had done.
Standing before him was enough to want to vomit. Fear. The thought of being some useless whore again. She wanted to be something. She was nothing. That's all you'll ever be.
Trust no one. Even if they are trust worthy, on the off chance that you’re wrong, everything will crumble. It’s better to be pleasantly surprised than to be stabbed in the back. Remember this, son.
No matter how much he loathed his father, Fernando could not bring himself to shut off the echoing voices of wisdom from plaguing his mind. The senile old fool had always been right, an aspiration to inspire if he hadn't been so cold and harsh. But that had made Fernando into the beast that he was today. An unstoppable monster. Something he wanted Anna to so desperately become.
He was lonely.
He had seen something in her that made her worthy.
He had been wrong.
Your obsession is unhealthy.
If there was anyone Fernando could trust, it would be his pokemon. Even then, he kept them at a distance but always open to their assessments. Against their wishes, he found himself slouched against his arm chair, waiting for her, watching her.
“Whenever you’re ready.”
Last Edit: Dec 8, 2012 13:25:52 GMT 9.5 by zubatman
She flinched, not expecting the voice in the silence of the home. Whatever words she would try to form would only make their appearance in deep breaths. How difficult would it be to uncurl her fists from the sides of her skirt? Anna was still processing how to block out any current thought and follow an old routine.
She was drugged then, though.
The woman took a breath, nodding and slowly easing herself out of the lower article of clothing, turning to the side, closing her eyes as she arched her back to add a larger proportion to everything. Her movement was anything but smooth, but at least she was moving. Focus on your breathing.
The discarded skirt would be nudged aside with a foot as she brought her hands forward to her knees, slowly trailing them up her quads until they found themselves at the lower hem of her shirt. She would grasp the fabric, much too tightly, and begin to pull it away from the skin, up and over her head.
She couldn't close her eyes any tighter than she already had- it was a nightmare she was trapped in, a force that she could not stop.
And she had only done it to herself.
Anna would refuse to give him the satisfaction of hearing the whimper escape her throat. Unfortunately, Anna wasn't in control.
Fernando could only watch her for a moment before grunting. Forced guttural noises signaled that he was interrupting her oh-so-erotic display. “I recall it being much more exciting than this.” Only a moment passed before Fernando regretted his decision. He knew he was pushing her, even now she was struggling to keep up to her promise. But still, he had to press her limits. Make her go farther and surpass the secret, low standards that he expected from her.
The remote positioned on his armrest would be put to good use as radio turned on behind them. Smooth, purposeful R&B would break the silence of the room, shadowing her whimper as Fernando unloosened his collar. He would be willing to sit here all night just to get a glimpse of what he wanted.
"It was different." At least she would manage to choke those three words out, the broken voice only a foggy window into her thoughts, as if her body language didn't make them obvious. He had wanted a smile. He wasn't going to get one, not anything natural. Holding back a cough, Anna would try to remember the advice she had first been given four years ago, upon entering slavery. Stay calm. Act natural. It doesn't last forever.
Yes it does.
She would try to follow those rules, rolling out her shoulders, taking deeper breaths to ease the tremble of her body. At least in that small window of putting herself elsewhere Anna would be able to approach him, running a single finger down his chest for only a brief moment before she turned away, taking approximately three steps while her hands travelled to the clasp of her bra, the hooks coming undone with ease before tossed it to the pile. Her left arm would cover the newly exposed skin as she turned again, right thumb hooking the remaining undergarment.
It doesn't last forever. It doesn't last forever. It doesn't last forever. You deserve this. You deserve misery.
You’re not worthy. I actually like him. You’re a monster. I’m in love with him. He’s better than you.
Mustering the strength to quench his rasping anger took more out of him than it should have. Ignoring the ever present buzzing at the back of his head took some effort. It didn’t take away the factor that Anna was now before him, almost as nude as the day he found her, giving him something he had never dared to force onto her.
This is nice, he forced onto himself.
Instead of glaring at her with his signature, sinister smirk, he found himself displaying a more curious, mystified expression. This was exceptionally better than what he had expected. If had hadn’t known better, he’d be leering at her with the lewd glance that donned the faces of the privileged men who had seen her in action.
Caught in a ragged stupor, Fernando kept silent, waiting for her next move.
She was in the back of her mind, a puppet of the past. The music had been playing, yet she hadn't heard it. She did now. The sounds were enough to send a flood of new memories to break the facade she had managed to hold for the short period of time. Eyes that had been half closed were opened wide, skin that had been smooth gathered chills. She had been in the midst of approaching him once more, her fingers lightly brushing along his jaw.
It was almost like waking up.
She could only stare at him, a deer in the headlights. Heat would rush to her her face, her heart would pick up its pace, her breathing would quicken. Anna'a hand recoiled, both arms gathered on her chest as she took a step back, eyes locked on his. "I-... Can't."
Fernando had hardened his expression whenever she came closer, unfaltering to her touch. A sharp glare would be his only return as he noticed that the Anna before him was no longer his. Fernando hadn’t intended to play with a ghost. He wasn’t sure if his disappointed glare had been what set her off but he did little to remedy the situation.
“I didn’t expect you to,” he spat, attempting to seem more displeased than he had actually been. “Is that what they taught you? I don’t want a second hand show made for dead slops. You’re not that person anymore Anna.”
His voice would almost come as a relief, something other than the familiar melody in the air to focus on. It didn't calm her, but it was enough of a reminder. "Oh."
"Then-" She frowned, confused with what it was he wanted. Well, of course she knew what, but the 'how' was still both baffling and frightening. His glare was enough to reinforce the deeply rooted fear. She took a nervous glance around the room as she listened to him, thoughts racing. How was she to 'act like it'? Of course she had a course of action in mind, but would it be acceptable? Would she allow herself to do it? You owe it to him.
Anna hesitated before him, almost stumbling forward as she repeated her past approach, out of her instinct by this point. What was her limit? What wouldn't he allow? The woman found herself on the chair with him, her legs straddling his lap, her hands grasping the front of his shirt- perhaps then he could feel just how powerful her tremors were; how the color in her face was not some mistake of the lighting. She would tell herself to go closer, to initiate.
Fernando waited an eternity for her to clamber onto his lap. The patience of a devil waiting in holy garb. His stone face did little to betray his intentions as he placed his hands on her thighs, holding her but doing little to wander. Feeling her shrivel on top of him reminded him that she knew her place. He was the master and she her slave. That was the dynamic and only truth for the two conflicting souls.
“You’re scared,” he stated bluntly, keeping his eyes locked with hers.
The word left in a breath of air-- it was all too true. She couldn't even divert her attention elsewhere; anything was too risky, anything could set something off. There was little relief in the knowledge that she didn't mess that one step up, but it was just the beginning. His touch was enough to make her cringe. She had been expecting something rough from the start, and she wasn't going to put faith in some sort of false mercy. Anna would find that she had inched, if anything, closer, yet left enough space to create some sort of faux secure space. Such had been the point where she had walked away from Azel. That wasn't an option here.
"What are you waiting for?"
Last Edit: Dec 9, 2012 2:42:29 GMT 9.5 by zubatman
Fernando had to remind himself that this was more about her punishment than his desires. Finding the right amount of pushing without plunging her off the deep end would always be his fine art. Precision dotted her conviction, why she hadn’t left so long ago before he ensnared her into his services. Everyone has a limit, some break easier than others. Fernando couldn’t bear to lose her now, not after all he had invested into her.
Together, the two of them brought their faces just a bit closer to one another. Simple speech turned into hushed whispers as Fernando’s lips grew menacingly closer to her own. It almost seemed as if he was going in for the first kiss, but he stopped himself, pulling back and breaking into a smile.
“I’m not quite sure,” was his only answer. That and…
“You’re cute.”
Last Edit: Dec 9, 2012 8:58:42 GMT 9.5 by zubatman
She took a breath at his reply, the rattling of her lungs enough to remind her that she was not still. His already-balled hands tightened around the fabric of his shirt; why did every situation have to be too fucking familiar?
Anna would keep her squirming under her skin, and would keep her neck motionless as some movement between the two occurred. She would always brace herself. It felt like electricity-- until her moved away. Had she disappointed him again? Or was he simply toying with her? Neither came as a relief.
The frown could have been easily detected; her aversion to the word had not changed.
The feeling of her clinging onto the loose, open fabric that no longer covered his chest made Fernando want to break out in smile. Her vice grip caused the material to strain, wrinkling under her grip as she refused to move. If she wanted to play then he would be more than happy to oblige her. Fernando had all night to play with his favorite toy.
“You are,” he pointed out, a stern sense of authority behind the teasing claim. “So cute I could just eat you alive.”
Just how far did the abyss descend? Behind ever word lied a purpose, entrenched on making Anna completely miserable.
Last Edit: Dec 9, 2012 9:13:28 GMT 9.5 by zubatman
At least the sensation of his hands against exposed leg had nullified, less shocking than it initially had been. Not to say she was becoming accustomed to coming into the contact with what she knew were greedy palms, but their static place was easier to ignore as she held herself.
It hadn't occurred to her how exposed she really was.
She hadn't bothered to look down, hadn't bothered to remember the purple-red 'X' engraved into her chest.
The reminder was enough to make her jump again, recoiling from his shirt, recovering the exposed skin that she had so easily forgotten about.
"Cannibalism is frowned upon."
Maybe, just maybe she could deter him from her mistake-- unlikely, but the attempt was obvious. She would block out any meaning the words were meant to carry; she knew better than to truly listen to him at that moment.
Fernando has only kept his movements slow to prevent her from being frightened by his intimidating statute. Exposed and vulnerable, Anna was nothing more than a skittish Persian, ready to fall into a relapse the moment her senses picked up his intentions. That’s how thing always were. Keep her calm and eventually she would relax enough for him to worm his way past her defenses.
That train of thought brought him this far but it couldn’t explain why she had suddenly panicked and pulled away from him. Was it because of the conspicuous markings plastered onto her torso? Rarely, did Fernando mention it, opting to give her the peace of not having to deal with the disfigurement. The last thing he wanted was for her to be conscious of her body.
A drifting finger would find its way underneath her crossed arms, tracing along the exposed portions of the scar that her arms couldn’t cover.
She wasn't insecure. She didn't have room to be. Some things would never be erased though. That scared her. She would have rather gone back and fixed every little thing that she had counted as irrelevant at the time of their occurrence.
She wasn't nostalgic, either.
He was handling it better than she thought; part of her wanted to consider that he was actually willing to slink away. That would be the part that she shut out for good. Thankfully those hardly made it to her processed thoughts. It was that small window that had allowed Azel to get away unscathed.
Anna found herself jerking away from the cold touch, closed eyes having failed to alert her to the foreign, yet all too familiar, feeling. Leaving was not allowed. She took a deep breath as she tried to adapt.
Her recline had been a knee jerk reaction to the feeling of his rough skin grazing her own. Instinct had told her to flee, to do whatever she could to escape the haunting grasp of his touch. Reason would tell her to accept it, she had no choice. Such was the life of a slave.
“I’m not.”
As if to accentuate his claims, Fernando became bolder with his touches. Soft grazes became daring caresses, keeping to the outline of her scar. It would serve as the catalyst of his affection.
“You’re stupid.”
He jerked, reeling her in.
“You’re useless.”
Ragged breaths would beat against her bare skin.
“You’re flawed.”
He dared to let his tongue trace against the tarnished flesh.
“But you’re most beautiful than you could ever know.”
Fernando no longer trusted his eyes to fully appreciate the overdue flower before him. Anna’s blossoming would bear him the fruit of his labors, pinning her here fully ripened for his taking. Sight proved unreliable in gauging her value, forcing Fernando to rely on his sense of taste to get a grasp of how far she had progressed. But even Fernando couldn’t bear to sink his fangs into the fruit of Eden, so he’d settle for the glistening shell, savoring and growing in his need to sample the forbidden fruit.
“And you’re mine.”
Last Edit: Dec 9, 2012 11:38:19 GMT 9.5 by zubatman
His action would be accepted, later resulting in bitter tears Anna had failed to hold back. His mouth against her, his hands in places she had feared they would roam; it had been too much for her to take.
She hadn't expected to break so early.
Her recovery occurred soon enough, fortunately. His words had assured that. She had actually confided in him, if only for a few moments, yet she never expected it to work as well as it did.
Fernando was ever relentless. He demanded his show, she failed to give it to him twice. Three times, even. Her touches meant nothing to either of them, her motions resulting in her own embarrassment.
For a brief while she was able to step away from the actuality of their situation, his uncharacteristically gentle lips meeting her hesitant ones more than once. She had responded to his tender touch with her own-- both had been silent, and she would never admit to having enjoyed it, if only for a while.
'As promising as it is to touch you, this has only served as a distraction from your assignment.'
The words had been crushing. But Anna was stubborn. She was punished for an attempt she could never follow through, her acts of stalling disobedience ended with her straddling his lap, yet nothing explicit would occur.
He was gentle. She wasn't scared. Not then. His greatest accomplishment had been her biggest fear, until then.
He dismissed her to warm the bed.
She snatched the invitation like a greedy child, yet the feelings she had entered her punishment with changed significantly.
'Take five. I'll need you ready for tonight. You owe me another show.'
The words would echo through her head all day. Dreadful. Anna was confident that tonight would be significantly different from the previous. Fernando couldn't be patient forever.
Despite the fear, Anna found herself before him for a second time, the frown on her face telling more than she would say out loud. It was a question, a snap of defiance, a bitter disappointed expression that failed to mask what she would rather have kept hidden.
"Whenever I'm ready?"
The words came out with more bite than she intended; troublesome, to say the least. The knit of her brows displayed her frustration for only a moment.
Why couldn't she control herself?
I'll never be ready.
"Should I remind you that you will never be satisfied?"
Now, more than ever, Fernando was unsure as to how to proceed. Being gentle had never been his forte, rather, he took a delight in the very opposite. Last night had been him stepping outside the comfort of his box, retaining the core of his character while compromising to meet hers. Here lies in the problem: how the fuck is he supposed to act today? Spoiling her would be counterintuitive, just as much as showering Johto with sunshine and horseshit. If he wasn’t careful then perhaps Anna would end up just like the neighboring region; unready and torn to pieces at the first sign of danger.
Force feeding her a side of him that didn’t exist was just as dangerous as snapping her in half. Something he’d like to avoid, if possible. So, obviously the answer was the meet somewhere in the middle. Preserve the progress they had made while rekindling the fear that was to be expected. Fernando would mock her, annoy her, bash her for all it was worth to stir up some sort of irritation. If she bucked, he would loosen up on her. If she stood her ground, then he could push her over the next threshold.
“You catch on quick. I like that.”
Once again, he’s the asshole, the relentless monster who wants to do nothing more than eat her up. It’s not a façade, far from it, but it’s not himself. Everything he shows has a purpose, all part of some master plan. The only difference between here and the heated room of the board of trustees is that he doesn’t have to set a trap.
Anna has long since thrown herself into the cage. She likes it more than she’ll ever care to admit.
Anna would find that avoiding his eyes would prove more difficult than she had originally thought. The brave idiot that she usually repressed whispered in her ear, challenge him, challenge him,, yet she would ignore the buzz and command the imp to return to the rotting sector of her mind. Defying Fernando so abruptly would end with her face pressed against the floor as he asserted his unquestionable dominance for sure.
Instead she would allow the glare to direct itself at the corners of the ceiling. She had a growing suspicion he would be filming each night. Anna never put her boss above blackmail, let alone blackmail to such a degree as her own situation. She was looking away as he spoke. "I've been learning from the best." The words were empty. True, but empty. She didn't care to feign flattering him now.
The night's schedule was what she had her mind on. Anna was half tempted to become her ghost again-- it always lessened the pain of stripping, but he liked to watch her squirm. Perhaps if she were to give him what he wanted earlier on she would be dismissed to the comfort of the bed sooner. Highly unlikely.
Anna would take the offensive without hesitation tonight. She had decided that she was in no mood for him games, not now. The buzz told her she would regret her decision later, but such was disregarded as she hiked herself onto his lap, hands playing at the lower hem of her blouse before she pulled it over her head, tossing it aside as she wrapped an uncharacteristically sturdy hand in her boss's shirt. A familiar position for the both of them.
Fernando wasn’t quite sure whether or not he appreciated her sudden boldness. Tempting as it was, the resurgence of her bravery was making her less predictable than he’d like. At least she was learning, and quickly at that. To think that the timid woman from before, huddled into a corner, on the urge of breaking down could become this? He would’ve said it was preposterous. A weakling like that would have to be trained—shaped until they became a deviant mistress. The type who would grab him by the collar, unafraid to hoist herself onto her rightful place: his lap.
"I've been learning from the best."
Of course! Who better to teach than the grader himself? From what better place could he bend the rules, docking points as he pleased just to prevent her from passing? If he was going to pass her then she would have to go by his rubric, one which tolerated nothing but the best. One that was quickly discarded as the clothes started flying. Say what they will about tops and covering, Fernando was never one for mystery.
“Be careful with your invitations. I might take you up on that.”
Last night he had been a stone, unimpressed and unbudging at her cheap theatrics. Tonight? The lecherous spectacle on his face told her what he wouldn’t. A man, no matter how intelligent, objective, and perfect, was still a man. Fernando couldn’t fight simple biology. Instead, he’d fight the urge to throw her on the floor and make her call him daddy.
Luckily for her, Fernando didn’t feel redundant today.
This was okay. This is what she was used to. Swallowing an ounce of fear would hold off the rest, at least for now. She wondered if he could catch the hesitation the moment before she took her place on him. How she had been concerned with his reaction for a fraction of a second. If he did, he didn't mention it. Instead of pulling him in, Anna used the small grip on him she did have to pull herself in, pausing in front of his lips, making sure they weren't in contact just yet. She would rest her forehead on his, her eyes finally brave enough to meet his.
"It wasn't an invitation."
She would kiss him after the statement, her touch only a bit rougher than her usual-- she wouldn't dump all of her confidence on him at once, she would reserve what she still had. Which was exactly why her brassiere and skirt were still very much in place on her body.
It felt strange to be without hesitations in this position; she deemed it as an unexpected pleasure, keeping the title to herself. Anna would pull away from her boss for only a moment, a chance to let him speak (though he could if he had wanted to). In the meantime her free hand had found its way to his bare chest, having broken under the fabric that hid it. She would always be fascinated with the muscle structure-- she couldn't place a reason, she just knew that the feeling made her content.
If there was anything Fernando hated more than his father, it was teasing. The whole concept that someone could prevent him from getting what he wanted until they thought otherwise was astoundingly stupid. He took what he wanted when he wanted it. It was that simple. Third rule of physics and proved to be more than theory on various occasions. You didn’t prevent a Silph from taking their hearts desire.
A moment’s pause could feel like an eternity. Still, he waited, ever so patient as Anna tried to make some sort of connection with his eyes. All she would see was a primal, carnal hunger. One that threatened to swallow her whole if she wasn’t careful. She had not yet earned her place to show such dominance.
The kiss, if you could call it that, became irrelevant as Fernando tried to submerge himself in the experience. What was considered tender last night became mere tickling today. His stomach was starving for something so much more. Letting up on her offensive would only serve as an opening, allowing him to grab her by the waist keeping her from struggling as he came in for the kill.
“You’re so delicious.”
As if to make sure the statement wasn’t empty, Fernando found himself licking at her collarbone. She could play with him however she liked but his advances would not be stopped. His sharp tongue found itself trailing up against her neck, tracing over her jugular. Oh how easy it would be for him to take a bite, to show him just how much he starved for her.
Plans had changed once again, something that Fernando would have preferred to avoid. What was supposed to be a session of scorn and ridicule was going to turn into Fernando trying to stave himself from devouring the feast in front of him.
If the hunger in his eyes hadn't been enough to warn her that she would soon become prey, his words would erase any leftover doubt. Anna hesitated to continue, suddenly unsure of herself-- how far could she go today? It would seem like she would suffer the consequence of poor planning as she his hands lock on to her, a wordless way of telling her there was no getting out of it.
The restriction would make her want to squirm away, even if she was fully aware of the impossible. Anna's attempt to shift from his grasp proved futile as his tongue met her delicate skin for a second time. She bit back the whimper of surprise, the sound dissolving into a soft grunt. Her breathing would quicken as he passed her throat, his movements seeming excruciatingly slow. She felt like the gazelle with the lion at its windpipe, the bite not deep enough to kill, but enough to make a point. Leave a mark.
She would flinch at his proximity, deep breathing the only thing to keep her chest from heaving, although the beginning shreds of panic could easily be felt through her skin.
Her heart was racing.
The punishment wasn't about her backing down, though. It was about giving him a show. The painful reminder would cause her frown to return as she forced herself to continue, allowing her spine to arch as her free hand unclasped the only article left on her upper body. She wouldn't remove it-- too difficult for the moment. Anna would find her hips moving against him; something she would consider much different from the previous night, where the motion was forced.
Why didn't it feel forced?
She couldn't possibly want anything from him. That would have been wrong. And stupid.
What was supposed to be crocodile tears and a plead to stop had been replaced by an inaudible grunt. Progress had most definitely been made and he would be enjoying it. Lost in desire, he wouldn’t stop at that. Anna was the sweetest candy he had ever tasted, forcing him to relish in her taste as his tongue continued to lap at her neck. He even considered kissing her, sucking on flesh long enough to make his mark. Then the entire world would know that she belonged to him and only him.
The movement of her hand would stop him from enacting his plan. Instead, he would pull away, licking his lips as he anticipated her next move. Pleased by her choice, he took the chance to help her out, allowing one of his hands to leave her waist and to snatch the bra right off of her body. It wouldn’t even hit the floor before his fingers filled its void, desperate in their need to outline her scar. His fixation with the spot was almost as unhealthy as his fixation with her.
Almost.
“How do you want it?”
The question was a response to the motion of her movement, something that had surprised him the night before. Hopefully, by seeming merciful, it would instill some notion of trust in him, if even just a smidge. It would make it that much sweeter when he betrayed her and disregarded her answer completely.
Last Edit: Dec 16, 2012 13:55:00 GMT 9.5 by zubatman
Anna would allow herself to relax under his grasp just this one; that is what she would tell herself, her only shred of reassurance. She was caught in a fog-- one she didn't quite want out of. She hadn't realized her head had been lolled to the side to allow more of his presence until she reopened her eyes.
"I don't." she said roughly, the outline of her shallow grin the only thing to signify her lack of care to disguise the lie. Try as she would, even Anna knew Fernando could read her more than any open book; more like a child's novel, the letters bold, large and obvious. She would continue to move against him in spite of her statement, glancing down as she felt his hand against her chest-- she was accustomed to the feeling, fine with the fixation. She would consider the scar the weakest part of her armor, an opening that had once been a gaping, bloody portal to what kept her blood flowing. Doors had closed since then, and so had she.
Fernando had been right all along. As much as she would deny it, Anna wanted this just as much as he did. His method of taming her had been effective—dangerously effective. The sheer exposure of her neck was a testament of that. Otherwise, she would have shied away from his touch; any and everything to resist him. Any claims of an intent to please him would be discarded, disregarded as deliberate lies. Anna wasn’t the only stubborn one. Fernando could be just as bull-headed, especially on the rare occasions that he was wrong.
“You’re lying~”
It wasn’t about whether or not the statement was true. It was about sending a message, that her answer had been rejected. Fernando would accept nothing short of the answer he wanted. But answers could manifest in different ways. Exuberant expression and reckless actions were amongst his favorite. The motions of her hips would take the cake.
What a snake pit. She had been attracted by the serpent and its colors, only to be caught as prey by the beast before she could test the waters and flee. She would force herself to stay, act strong, give him what he wanted-- which was to see her desire slip into view. To say her whole act was a complete lie right now would be untrue; some part of her did want to do this. It was the same part that hadn't hit Azel away when he had touched her. The unrefined, instinctual beast that refused to listen to her mind's commands. That troublesome thing that had started everything.
Anna would go on though, too deep in the pit to see the light of the entrance. The best she could do was proceed, getting the mask of the deviant on all the while. Her true nature would recoil in the back of her mind, curled up to be the weak thing it was until she and Fernando were done here.
"You would have said such either way."
Her movement would grind deeper, her pace would quicken, and her breathing would take on a new sound as she waited on his next move. Yet she would continue to speak out of habit, the words about to fall into the air ones she had been all too used to repeating.
"My wants are irrelevant. Nonexistent. It's not about what I want."